Wednesday, November 03, 2010

Woo is Me

I am so tired I can barely keep my eyes open. I really didn't get much sleep last night and what I did get was not restful. At 12:30 Erik took Kiko out to do his business. Kiko saw a rabbit and took off like a shot after the rabbit. Erik woke me up to help him find the dog. After that I had a hard time falling asleep and then I woke up at 5:00 a.m.

Being this tired doesn't help my mental state. I'm feeling very depressed. Last night, after watching election results, I just wanted to pull the covers over my head and not have to face the world ever again. I want to avoid people and withdraw into the comfort of my little home.

I don't think I believe in God any more. I was always taught that to ask and it shall be given. I keep asking and keep waiting and nothing changes. I don't believe there is anyone there to answer prayers. If there is a God, why can't he stop all the hate and bigotry and racism and greed. Why is evil taking over? If God is all powerful, why is there so much pain and hate and suffering?

1 comment:

Krisha said...

aaaah, my dearest friend, I've tried those shoes on and they will never make you feel better, kick them to the curb. You KNOW this world will NOT get better, God has it written down in the Bible, and you DO know there is a GOD, just look at your children and your grandchildren! Prayers are answered, not always the way we want them answered. Politics is where most of the evil is, I agree, and that is where the devil himself will come through, and that is why I don't get bogged down with the voting results, I put my 2 cents on the ballot, even though I know it won't change things the way I want them to.I don't even take the local newspaper anymore. You say you walk by faith? Go put THOSE shoes back on, your glory is in heaven and we both know it. I went through three years with this same state of mind, and it will eat you alive and NOTHING will change. Go love those kids & grandkids, THEY NEED YOU in their life. Our lives have been entwined for many years, your pain is always felt by me, call me anytime you want to talk.