What to do with myself?

I have come to the realization that I am just not happy right now. There is nothing in my life that excites me...nothing to look forward to. I don't know how to find what it is that would make me feel alive again. Right now I feel like I'm watching life pass me by ... Like I'm just biding my time. What to do? What to do?

Imagine......

Imagine a place where all the public schools have been closed and only the children of the wealthy are entitled to an education....a place where all the forests have been chopped down...a place where water does not have to be disinfected while at the same time the lakes and rivers have been polluted by toxic waste and chemicals being dumped by corporations in their gutting of the land....where electricity, water, and heat are controlled by corporations who can charge what they want for services and who can discriminate against those not able to afford them....a place where jobs don't exist other than cleaning the toilets of the wealthy or bussing their tables....a place where small business have had to close their doors because no one has any money to buy their goods or services.

Welcome to Wisconsin...Ohio....New Jersey....

Welcome to the United States as the Republicans envision it.

2011 Sucks

So far the year 2011 sucks! On January 4 Chuck ended up in the emergency room just hours after my brother was admitted to the same emergency room. My brother had pneumonia; Chuck has Meniere's Syndrome and is still unable to drive. He is being treated at the National Dizzy and Balance Center. No sooner were Chuck and my brother home, when my knee began giving me problems. I saw my doctor at the end of January and got a cortisone shot in the knee, only to have the knee totally give out a day later. I am walking with crutches and looking at total knee replacement surgery in a few weeks. And the snow and cold keeps coming.....

Like I said, 2011 sucks!

Woo is Me

I am so tired I can barely keep my eyes open. I really didn't get much sleep last night and what I did get was not restful. At 12:30 Erik took Kiko out to do his business. Kiko saw a rabbit and took off like a shot after the rabbit. Erik woke me up to help him find the dog. After that I had a hard time falling asleep and then I woke up at 5:00 a.m.

Being this tired doesn't help my mental state. I'm feeling very depressed. Last night, after watching election results, I just wanted to pull the covers over my head and not have to face the world ever again. I want to avoid people and withdraw into the comfort of my little home.

I don't think I believe in God any more. I was always taught that to ask and it shall be given. I keep asking and keep waiting and nothing changes. I don't believe there is anyone there to answer prayers. If there is a God, why can't he stop all the hate and bigotry and racism and greed. Why is evil taking over? If God is all powerful, why is there so much pain and hate and suffering?

States I've Visited

visited 30 states (60%)
Create your own visited map of The United States

Jesus and Healing the Poor

Jesus and His disciples came to a town, and in the square of that town He preached and He called to the people to come and be healed.

And those with ailments and those covered with sores and boils and those afflicted with all manner of maladies sought His healing.

Jesus approached the first person, a man who lay on a litter, his pain and suffering writ on his face. As Jesus knelt to lay His hands on the man, Peter stepped forward.

“Wait Lord, ” he said. “Are you a participating provider for this man?”

Then Andrew said “Should we not determine whether he suffers from a pre-existing condition?”

Matthew added, “He may be so ill that it would strain Your resources to heal him. In that case, You should not try. Let him seek help elsewhere.”

Then James son of Zebedee and John chimed in. “Why do You not ask for payment?” asked James.

“Surely it is not fair to those who pay their healers if You heal these people without cost,” John pointed out.

“After all,” said Simon Zealot, “what if his condition was brought about by the way he lived? Should he not bear responsibility?”

“I question whether You should heal the children,” said James son of Alphaeus. “Their parents should be working to pay for their care.”

“Indeed,” said Thomas, “if You heal them every time they will never learn personal responsibility.”

“Then they will always rely on the support of others,” said Philip.

“Besides, aren’t there better people to help?” argued Bartholomew.

“They should pull themselves up by their bootstraps,” proclaimed Thaddeus.

Judas Iscariot stared from one disciple to the next. “Oh for crying out loud!” he said. “They don’t have BOOTS!” But they paid him no heed so he went to find an inn and wine.

And Jesus?

Jesus wept.

(Copyright D. Scanlon 2010)

Motivated by Firefly